Bubbles, and Paints, and Glitter - OH MY!

I picked up the littles after school without any issues.  they recognized me and were very excited!  We got to the house and had a snack and they settled in.  Dinner was bean and cheese quesadillas which they gobbled up!  Then I let them watch a movie and it was time for bed.  They all went down easily and slept well.  Saturday we took things nice and slow.  I had fixed some dough and put in in the fridge on Friday and so I made cinnamon rolls for saturday morning.  YUM!!  Once that was cleaned up and all were dressed and ready for the day I made some salt dough and we played with cookie cutters.  While the ornaments were baking we played outside with bubbles, chalk, and the scooters!  It was horribly windy and that wind was cold but they didn't seem to notice bundled up in their coats.  I sat in the sun and laughed at their antics!  Lunch was homemade lunchables and fruit.  They played happily with crayons and legos as I put stew on for dinner.  Then we got out the paints and glitter and googly eyes and I though their eyes were going to pop out of their heads!  We somehow managed not to get paint on clothes....a miracle if you ask me!  But of course glitter went everywhere as it always will!  Snack time found them with bowls of popcorn and watching another movie.  We made jingle bell jewelry with colored pipe cleaners.  They enjoyed dinner and after a quick clean up it was time for baths and bed.  We did showers instead of baths and this was something new to them but they did great!  They really enjoyed getting to sit by the fireplace and get warm after their showers.  Bed time was again easy and they slept all night.  Sunday we got up about 7 with the little boy running through the house hollering "sun's up!"  The girls were not happy with him!!  I thought it was funny!  We had more of the cinnamon rolls for breakfast and I took some of the stew for lunch at church.  They were shy at first at church but quickly warmed up and had fun.  We got home in the afternoon and got their things all together and ready to head back to their foster home.  The little boy was really wound up and not wanting to listen but we managed.  It's hard to have kids that aren't your own in the house.  I know my response to them would be different if they were placed here.  They are good kids though and we had fun!  I told their foster mom I would take them again in a heartbeat!  As challenging as it may be, I am still very thankful to be able to do this!

Fun x3

This weekend we are getting to provide respite care for J's three siblings!  We are excited!  They are really sweet kids.  Of course at the ages of 5 and 6 they are BUSY!!  So I'm planning on doing salt dough ornaments with them, letting them paint them, and of course they will have plenty of outside time!  I'm thinking maybe a movie for Friday night, the ornaments and outside play for Saturday, then we have church on Sunday, then they go home that evening.  Will be a fun weekend!  and none toooooooooo stressful since the kids know us and we know them.  Makes everyone more comfortable!

Moving on

The decision was made today that J will not be returning to us after all.  My heart aches.  His hurts run far deeper than anyone had imagined.  And J needs help from those trained to deal with those deep layers of pain.  If only those extra cuddles and life with a "normal" family were enough ...... but they aren't.  We do not know yet when J will be moving to his next place, so for now we will go and visit when we can.  With every child our lives are changed, I just pray that we are making a positive impact on their lives as well.  Please hold J and all of us in your prayers.  Letting go is never easy.......

Challenges

Recent days have been challenging to say the least.  It got to the point that I began to feel like my life was a war zone.  After yet another battle this morning, I made some phone calls, met with the Psychiatrist, and J was admitted to our the mental hospital.  This is not his first time there.  They will be monitoring him as they make changes to his medication.  Previously his admission was part of moving to another home.  Once I assured him that when the hospital said it was ok he would be coming home again he began to settle down.  My heart just breaks for him, but I am so thankful that he can have the chance to be more stable emotionally and get the help he needs to achieve that!  He is such a precious little boy and I am going to miss his giggle around here.  We will get to visit him though and he can call home as well.  This is new territory for him in that aspect.  Don't know how long he will be there, but I anticipate life being a little easier for us all when he returns than it has been over the last few days.

First Day

J had a good first day of school!  He woke up just before 4 this morning and was playing around for about half an hour.  Thankfully he was able to go back to sleep.  I got him up just after six and he was very excited to get ready for school!  Kerrie went with me to drop him off and we both gave him quick hugs and were on our way back home.  I picked him up in the afternoon and man was it HOT like 105F HOT!!  UGH!!  We were thankful to come home to nice cool air.  Once Russ got home and changed we went out for tacos!  Going out to dinner on the first day of school is a tradition around here.  So that was a fun thing for us!  They do not nap during the day at this school and so as J was watching a movie while waiting for Russ he fell asleep.  I know he will sleep well tonight!  I have been able to meet with his teacher and help her know and understand him a little better.  I really like her so far!  She is willing to communicate with me to help J so we are forming a good team. 

Road trip

J did great on our road trip!  He watched movies in the car and that really helped him pass the time.  He had met Russ' folks and so going to their house was not too strange...just a new location not new people.  He did get to meet Russ' brother and brother's wife.  Going to a new church with LOTS of new people was just a bit too much on the heels of a full day of travel the day before and so J and I sat out of Church.  Monday we took the jogging stroller to the mall so he had a safe place to be while we were out and that made a huge difference for him.  He had a GREAT time in Build-a-Bear and in the Lego store!  He took the bear he made and called it his son and was very gentle with it.  So sweet to see!  Tuesday was another day in the car but movies again passed the time.  Yesterday was a bit more challenging as he was very tired from the trip but even though he made some sad choices, and he got mad at me, he simply cried on his bed then let me rock him and all was right with the world again!  Such a HUGE difference from some of his tantrums!  Not long now till we start a new routine with school!  He is excited to get started!!

possible solution

Yesterday J and I started talking about finding something else to do when was mad other than throwing things, hitting, and screaming.  He started up this morning working himself into a fit so I scooped him up gently and we sat on the couch rocking back and forth and talking.  This seemed to diffuse him very quickly and he was much happier after that.  So we decided that when he starts getting mad or upset he can come sit in my lap and we will rock and talk.  I hope he really will do it.  He has begun hugging me now.  I have watched him start hugging everyone else, but he was not reaching out to me for some reason.  I just waited knowing he would come to me in his own time and he has.  I know he is pushing the limits some to try to find the point at which we will reject him too.  Thankfully we are equipped to handle this with God's help and he is not finding rejection where he expects it.  We keep focusing on the fact that he is a good boy even when he doesn't make good choices.  He's growing, and slowly moving down the path of healing.  It's a long road.....

full week

It's been a very busy week, but we had only one day of challenges!  I had really anticipated more, but J has done really well this week.  Even with several VERY full days in a row he has kept a cheery disposition and kept up with his chores!  So for the second week in a row he earned all his stars on his chart!!  He's VERY excited about his puzzle prize this week!  Next week will be a busy one too but he will have fun at VBS!

Successes

As we prepared to be a foster family and we read and discussed and trained, I really wondered if I would remember all that I was learning.  Well I am remembering enough to have successes in dealing with the challenges I'm presented with.  J decides now and then that he needs to find out what will happen if he does x y or z.  Thankfully he is responding well to the redirection I give.  Today he said "I throw fit" and threw a couple of toys....those toys went into time out and then I was "mean" and he went off to his room.  I checked on him after a couple minutes and he rocked with me for a minute and he was ready to go play.  He has been mostly his cheerful self the rest of the day!  It's nice to know that these principles I've been learning really do work!  So he can push, challenge, or just be cheerful and I am confident that we will be able to tackle it all together and come out on top!

Honeymoon

This refers to the time when a child is placed in a new environment and just wants to please.  There is usually no evidence of negative behaviors and life is grand!  This is what we have been experiencing for the last 3 weeks.  Starting yesterday we began getting a sneak peek into some of the challenges we and J will face together.  One thing that was heartbreaking is to hear him say "I bad boy?" I quickly corrected him and told him that he is a GOOD boy even when his choices are bad.  It's so easy to let slip "be good" or "you're being bad"  when it's the choices in behavior that are what's bad not the child.  We have weathered the first storm together and have come out on top!  He is finding the boundaries, testing the rules, and finding out what will happen.  Though tiresome and draining these are good things for him to be doing and show that he is truly feeling at home with us.  J is still showing us his sweet side most of the time and he gets lots of praise for that.  His star chart for chores is working well too.  For the most part life just keeps whistling it's happy tune, we are just starting to have a few hiccups thrown in.

Broken record

I feel like one!  And what a great thing!!  J is just a super kid!  We are all getting more comfortable with one another and meshing well.  His siblings came to our cookout and they had so much fun!  they played legos, blew bubbles, giggled tons, ate loads of water melon, and I think were pretty tuckered out by the end of the evening!  I know J was!  After everyone went home the big kids put in a movie and he fell asleep in the bean bag while watching it.  He didn't hardly bat an eyelash when we scooped him up and took him to bed.  So sweet!  He is spending hours on end playing with legos!  We are enjoying watching him ride the trike too!  He is learning to be more gentle with the animals and they are loving him back now.  Fun stuff!  He is looking forward to school starting again too!  We will have to see about his enrollment this week or next.

Dr visits

Yesterday J had his appt with his psychiatrist and with his therapist today.  Both visits were fantastic!! OH and we had a FABULOUS time at the park yesterday evening with his siblings!!  We had read a story about going to the park for a picnic and having cup cakes so of course we had to stop and get some cup cakes to take.  So much fun!!  Then today J asked if he could call me mom.  He has been referring to me as mom for several days when talking to the big kids.  He's really bonding with Russ too which totally blows me away.  He's showing good signs of attaching and that is such a HUGE step forward for him!  We are still enjoying him so very much!  and yesterday those who had not seen J in awhile said how much happier he looked.  And he's initiating hugs here and engaging in play!!  These are things that he has not done well before!  So we are very excited to get to help him along the way in this journey toward healing.

Good weekend

(to prevent any confusion this is a reminder that J was previously A)
J had a great weekend!  He is bonding with Russ some too!!  He had a great time at church too!  We went to the park with some friends last Friday and he played hard!  We are planning a picnic and play time at the park tomorrow with his siblings.  looking forward to that!  Then they are going to come out to our house for our 4th of July cookout!  Still not having any negative behaviors.  He is just a super sweet little boy!  He is acting more and more like a little brother to the big kids though and that is fun to see.  He wants to know where I am at all times and still won't leave my side for long.  He is content to just play near me though and doesn't require constant interaction.  I do believe he is stabilizing very well.

first visit

we had a good time yesterday.  the morning was spent just "doing" at home then after lunch we headed for town.  We had to stop at walmart to get Mykhal some swim trunks and A a life jacket ....we were heading for the pool!  Even though there were several vans there, the pool didn't seem overly crowded so we had a wonderful time playing for a couple of hours.  Once we got rinsed off and back into our day clothes we went back to walmart to get a few other things we needed.  We got A some new clothes that fit him.  so many of his things were way too big or just worn out.  He was so excited to have new things!  Finally it was time to head to Cici's pizza to meet up with the siblings.  A was so very excited to see them and they him!  So many hugs and kisses!  We were prepared for negatives after the visit since that has happened in the past but we didn't have any!  No "fall out"!  He was wound up a good bit from the excitement but settled right down when it was time for bed.  A has also decided he wants to be called Jr. since that is what his sibs call him.  We are happy to use whatever name he desires!  He is is happy self today and has gotten to ride his bike this morning already.  Now he is playing with the ABC toy.  We have more errands to run today but not until after lunch.  He's a real trooper about our going and doing.  So we are still soaking up the fun!  I feel so blessed to get to love on him!

Still smiling

This little guy is just awesome!  not only is he a REALLY cute kid, but he is just precious!  He is settling in very well and we are having lots of fun together.  I was able to get in touch with the foster mom that has his siblings today and we are going to meet for dinner tomorrow evening at Cici's Pizza!  Little A is very excited!  He is coloring pictures for his siblings....so sweet!  He got to talk to one of his sisters today on the phone....just precious!  He continues to be obedient, cheerful, and constantly asking to make sure he is being good.  I know there will be challenging days, but we are certainly soaking up the fun right now!

Good day

Today has been a wonderful day!  A stayed in bed until I went to wake him this morning.  Then he was ready to play!  He ate well and got himself dressed.  We went to Lowes to get some building supplies and then to Wendy's for lunch.  He played silly little games with Kerrie as we went through Lowes and then ate all his burger at lunch and all of his frosty.  He told us he had to be good and had to eat all his food to get his ice cream.  Did not see any ill behavior even after the sugary treat.  The afternoon was spent riding bikes and playing with sidewalk chalk outside.  We ate a dinner of fresh fruits and veggies and he loved it!  Then he had fun playing in the bath tonight!  His giggle is so cute!  He sat down beside me on the couch and played with his favorite new toy a Magna doodle!  He is quite the budding artist!  Soon it will be bedtime.  He is excited about going to church tomorrow.

Little A

A arrived this morning and quickly made himself at home once the caseworkers left.  He is extremely polite, sweet, and desires to be near.  The many things I read about him before he came to us have not shown themselves to be currently true.  He is one smart little boy!  He does have some delays, and I know we will see more of his real problematic issues as he settles in, but for now he is absolutely charming!  He is enamored with his own space and toys just for him.  So far he has not eaten much but I know he likes grapes!  He has played outside with Mykhal and Kerrie this evening on bikes.  We got out the big tricycle for him to ride.  We did have to go to Walmart to get his medicines and then got some fun spiderman things for A while we waited.  He needed a toothbrush, new shoes, swim trunks, and we got him a watch.  He doesn't tell time yet, but it's a great learning tool!  We are watching a movie together this evening at A's request.  So our first few ours together have been great!

Another new adventure

We have been asked to take placement of a very troubled little 6 yo boy starting this Friday.  He has siblings but needs to not be with them.  He will get to see them once a week.  He has his own set of challenges and delays but so do all the rest.  We just have to keep in mind the things that are specific to him.  We are very excited to be able to provide a safe place for this little guy!  No idea at this time how long he will be with us but we will love on him while he is here. 

Decisions

After Russ got home yesterday afternoon and we had a wonderful meal with great conversation, it was decided that we will just foster and provide respite care.  If/when the need/desire arises we will adopt.  We are laughing at ourselves since this is totally opposite of what we had decided we wanted to do going into this process!  But this is what feels right to us as a family.  I have witnessed further healing, and our growth as a family.  We have drawn closer together and closer to God.  His touch in our lives never ceases to amaze me!  So Russ is planning to get his cpr/first aid certification updated tonight and then we will just wait for the next phone call! 

Letters

We got letters from our investigator today!  The investigation is finalized and closed and we were found at no fault.  We did find out that Russ has to take the cpr/first aid course other than what he gets through the military....silly I know but their rules are their rules.  So, I will get him scheduled to take that right after he gets home from this trip he's on and then we will be good to go on more kids!  and I can submit our homestudy for a little group that has stolen my heart. 

interviews

The interviews are all done now and the investigator hopes to have things wrapped up and filed by the end of the month.  She is having to do a good bit of traveling and helping in other regions over the next two weeks though so only time will tell if she can get our paperwork finished by the end of the month.  I'm not sweating things.....God's timing is perfect!

Impressions

The positive impressions went both ways with the investigator.  I was impressed with her and she was impressed with us and our home.  She still needs to interview Russ via phone since he couldn't get home in time, but her comments were very positive after interviewing the rest of us.  I do not get the feeling that anything negative is going to come from the things that happened.  It was certainly a learning experience!  Thanks to all for the prayers!!

another one

authorities higher than Bair or the baby's caseworker decided that the baby should not be in our home while we are under investigation.  so we sadly said goodbye to Baby G tonight.

Goodbyes

We had to say goodbye to Abey today.  There were choices made that required her to have to leave our home.  So it is with mixed emotions that we said goodbye.  She will not be allowed to return to our home so we wish her the very best in her future.  Our case manager said she would give us updates now and then and we will look forward to them.

schedules

The baby's case worker and I got visit times planned today.  She is planning to come out to the house for a home visit soon and we are going to discuss more about what's going on.  I just like to have an idea so we can plan and schedule things.  Daily visits are tiresome, but I know if I were the parents I would be holding on to those visits like precious jewels.  And if there is a time that something comes up in conflict they will transport him.  I would just rather do it myself.

Visits

Today we start visits with the family.  I found out that the mom has been pumping milk so I will be collecting that today at the visit so I can give that to baby boy.  And of course she will want to feed him during visits so hopefully the timing on all that will work out.  Baby is doing well.  My body is still adjusting to interrupted sleep, but I can thankfully take naps.  The case worker said it could still easily be 6 months to a year that little bug will be with us depending on the indictment.  But only time will tell. 
Abey is doing well and very much enjoying loving on the baby. 

Starting over.....

It doesn't take long to forget how much effort a newborn is!  Doesn't take long to be reminded either!!  Baby G is adjusting very well.  The first night was rough for both of us, the second night was a little better, but the last two nights he has slept soundly between bottles in his own little bed.  Makes it much easier on me!  The rest of the kids are enjoying the little one too.  He only fusses when he's hungry or is having his diaper changed.  And he smiles so much in his sleep!!  So sweet!!
Abey talked with her previous adoptive parents yesterday.  I got to talk to the mom too.  Abey was asking them if they would be willing to terminate their rights so that we could adopt her.  The mom said that she only wanted Abey to be happy and have the best chance in life possible, and with her being nearly bed ridden she couldn't bring Abey back home.  So the answer was yes they would be willing!  So now to figure that out!  Abey is so very excited!!  I think having the ability to share our name means a great deal to her.  We just have to make sure it is truly going to be the best option for her and that she will still be able to get the services she will continue to need.

So I'm going to quit opening my mouth!

See this is how it's been working:
1. God nudges me
2. I voice nudges to family
3. we tell case worker about nudges
4. God fulfills the nudge
Well no sooner had we thought that doing respite for under school age kids would be neat than......I get a phone call and there's a 3 day old baby that needs foster placement.  So we said yes...again.  We don't know how long we will have him but he's coming straight from the hospital tonight!  Life is NEVER dull!  But I think I better keep my mouth shut for awhile!

self talk

We had a great weekend in San Antonio!  Abey didn't try to sabotage anything and seemed to enjoy the weekend as much as the rest of us.  She really is "just one of the kids".  We did start talking about some of her negative self talk and how that can really be harmful.  It's mainly things like "I have bad memory"that we are working on.  She is responding well to the corrective things we say.  I know how much she wants those goals and dreams of hers to become real.  When our case manager came out for her first visit of the month Abey told her how much she loves it here with us.  It's good to know that she is saying that to other people too.  Gaining a teenage daughter has certainly change the family dynamics a bit, but all for the better.  We are now starting to look for brothers for Mykhal!  Yes we're nuts!  But it is a unanimous consensus that a pair of brothers would be a wonderful addition to our family!  So we are putting our info out and letting God bring the right kids to us!
Later this month we will be providing respite for a little 7 yo boy for a weekend.  I have heard he is a real handful, but he is also very artistic.  So we are planning to have plenty of art supplies for him to play with and I'll plan a kid friendly menu. 
Another thing we have been talking about is doing respite for under school age kids to see if that is an age group we want to work with or not.  And in doing respite we are helping other foster families!  Everyone wins!

Initial testing

Abey has been testing....not sure if she is even aware that she has been doing it or not.  But we have had "sick" times (some of it real and we got that straightened out).  I am beginning to see patterns of attention seeking behaviors.  I tolerate certain amounts of it and then shut it down with love and logic techniques.  She responds to this beautifully and whether she realized it or not is correcting herself some now too.  She is still a delight to have around and we work through our little hurdles throughout each day.  We have been having some great discussions one on one and as a family.  We are all growing!  I know there will be more testing....afterall she is a teenager!

Moving

Ok so it's only one bedroom to another, but it's still a move.  Abey has decided she would be more comfortable not being by herself at night.  So she has moved in with Kerrie.  Abey's first therapy appointment went really well, we have her monthly psych appointment this week.  School is going well and she continues to slowly settle into the family. 

First Visit

Our case manager came out today to check in.  She will need to come out twice a month since Abey is a moderate level care child.  She comes to make sure everything is running smoothly, answer any questions we have or Abey has, and take care of any paperwork that needs doing.  To get two visits in this month she will be out again next week.  She said that there is such a positive change in Abey since she has come to us....certainly feels good to hear that!  The child we see and know is so amazing!  She fits in so well with us!  Confirmation after confirmation that she is meant to be here!  I keep saying that my heart is just overflowing with joy.....and it's so true!! 

mistaken

Well it turns out that I was mistaken!  I got an email from Jackie today that she had gotten word from the person in charge of the group of 4 on the website.  Their picture had been removed because there had been so many people interested in these kids.  So now they are going over the homestudies to select the family they feel would be the best fit.....and our homestudy is among those being considered.  It's sooooo VERY exciting to know that these kids are going to have a forever family soon even if we aren't that family!  What a blessing for these kids!!!!

Gaining time

I checked the TARE website today to see if the group of 4 was still there.  They weren't....and we haven't heard anything so another family has been chosen as the right ones for them.  There is something of a sense of relief in knowing instead of just wondering.  We know there are more kids in our future but for now we will enjoy being a family of 6 again.  I think maybe in a few months we will consider again bringing more kids home.  Of course we will gladly accept any God brings to us!  Life is certainly never dull!

She's OURS!!!

We had a quick training class tonight that gave us enough to have a "Moderate care" level child placed with us.  Right after we went over the info we signed the placement paperwork and Abey is now here to stay!  She is so very happy to be part of a family and we are equally happy she is part of ours!

GOOD morning

B woke up feeling better this morning. YEA!!!!  We decided to sleep in this morning and I am glad.  Did get a phone call from Jackie right after I got up and we have one class we need to take that will be a couple of hours one evening and then B can be officially placed in our home.  We will still need to do some shadowing with another family, but that can pretty easily be worked out.  So it's looking quite certain that B will get to stay in our home!  New challenges, new adventures!  B will get enrolled in school it looks like on Tuesday.  It's good to have some time with her just getting to be part of the family.
Now to rework the chore chart!

sick

B was up most of the night last night crying in pain with her ears hurting.  I did all I could, but couldn't get the pain to subside.  Took her in to the Dr. this afternoon and she has double ear infections and a sinus infection.  Poor thing!  Got her meds and so she will soon be on the mend.  She is unpacking and sharing more and more with us.  By the time that they get around to actually sharing her case file with us, since they didn't get to that the other day, they won't be able to tell us anything we don't already know!  She seems to have so many of the puzzle pieces for healing already, but no one has taken the time to show her how to put them together.  We still aren't 100% sure she is going to be staying and I am doing my best to prepare her heart and ours.  She does seem to have a good relationship with God and I openly talk of my own faith.  I have said more than once that no matter what happens that God is going to take care of her and will take care of us, so everything will be OK.  It's not what she wants to hear, but I think she is beginning to listen to that.  She knows we will do all we can to keep her with us, but ultimately it's not our decision.  So for now we will love on her and provide her with FAMILY and pray and trust that we will all have that peace that passes understanding no matter what!

homecoming and progress

Just got a call from B's foster mom and things are nuts but working to our advantage.  B is coming home tomorrow!  As in MOVING in tomorrow!  We are ELATED!!
Got an email this morning from the TARE (Texas Adoption Resource Exchange website) coordinator over the group of 4 we put in our interest form on and she requested our homestudy be sent directly to a her since the selection panel is starting their review of homestudies and she wanted to make sure ours got in with the others.  Are we absolutely crazy to trying to do all of these?  maybe....
But we are moving forward the way we feel led  and so I leave it all in God's capable hands. 
B comes home tomorrow and we will focus on her.  Unfortunately they are requesting we keep her in public school for now.  And it's understandable.....for now. 
Our God is a mighty God and has continually assured me "I will equip and enable you".  So we trust, pray, and move forward!

keeping communication going

We set up an email for B through yahoo that she says she can access at school.  She has our phone number in several places and I have the foster mom's so B knows we can talk too.  Played "if/then" on the way to Abilene with her  - like if other kids get placed too then she might not have her own room, if things end up taking weeks or months before she can come be with us then we will do respite for her so she can spend time with us, if for some reason it is decided that it won't be in her best interest to be placed with us, then we will still keep in contact and do respite for her, and if another family that would be a better option comes along for her then she needs to do what is going to be best.
She left most of her stuff here with us.  She was tearful and scared that we were going to give up on her.  I reminded her that we were going to keep in touch with her and that I would keep her posted on things as we got more information. 
We talked a little about the group of 4 we put in a request for also.  and she said she would be good with sharing a room with Kerrie and another girl about that age.  I just don't know if we will be ready to handle all of them!  Jackie says it's worth considering.....glad to know she has faith in our abilities!  I'm not going to stress over it all, instead I'll let God handle it!  We'll talk to Jackie tomorrow and find out about B's documented past, and then see what we need to do next!

Changes

B is going back to her foster home today for a little while.  We don't have a definite time line though and so she is very scared.  We had first thought it was going to be just for a couple of days, but now they say it could be longer.  There's the knot of fear that they will change their minds on placing her with us.  The hold up is that she is a treatment level child and we are a basic level home.  The requirements for becoming a treatment level home are very clear and we don't know how to work around some of the time requirements other than just by getting special permission.  Don't even know if they do that kind of thing.  As Jackie said, this kind of thing just doesn't happen that often and so there are not set guidelines in place.  Tuesday Jackie will call again and go over B's case file with me.  They want us to know what all we are getting ourselves into.  I just know we can make a difference for this one child and then maybe later on down the road we will be able to help some more.  Right now our focus is going to be just on B.

Future

B was asking very pointed questions today about her future and us.  I could not lie to her so she knows  that we are going to work to keep her.  There are many struggles ahead of us, but we will take things one day at a time.  I have no doubt that she is meant to be ours.  Some may say her issues are too much for a first time adoption, or that we should only do long term foster, but through all of this God has continually told me "I will equip and enable".  I see clearly His hand in B's arrival in our lives.  Her becoming part of our family will be one of the hardest things we've ever done, but the rewards are even greater.  I have such peace and joy!

The first 48 hours

WOW! what a difference 48 hours can make!  B is honeymooning GREAT and is super sweet! Very helpful around the house and gets along great with all the kids. Turns out her reason for being removed from the home was real, not made up.  Arrangements were made so that the family could still keep all the kids in the home.  But B didn't want to go back even though she was very bonded to her foster parents.  The young lady who was the instigator of the trouble in the foster home is in the process of being adopted by the foster family.  B does NOT get along at all with this young lady and never has.  So she doesn't want to go back and mess up the chances of this other girl being able to be adopted.
During church last night a lot of changes were taking place in the hearts of my children. My oldest has been totally against having a child her age in the home.....until last night. She told me on the way home that she would be open to B staying with us longer. So we all talked more today while B was gone and decided we needed to talk to our Bair worker. When I picked up B today after her meeting, I got to talk to our worker and found out what all had transpired. I shared with her what was happening at home. She nearly had to pick herself up off the floor in shock, but said that with B being treatment level and us only a basic level then we would have to do more training. No big deal there! Anyway, to sum things up it looks like a Greater Hand has been involved from the start. If B truly doesn't want to go back to her foster home then she will become part of our family. We will foster to adopt. What about the group of 4 we have inquired about? well, if we get word to go ahead on them, then we will be reclassed as a group home and take them too! Yes, I'm out of my mind.....but I have such peace about all of this and everything is falling into place without any effort from us.....I don't believe in Co-incidence.  Her biggest issues are anger management and depression. Nothing we can't handle with the help of a therapist!

A side step

We were discussing this evening over dinner how we might be open to doing respite care so we could "get our feet wet" in dealing with kids from the foster care system.  No sooner had we decided that we would be ok with it, since it would be just a break for other foster parents and very short care situations, than the phone rang and it was Jackie asking us if we would be willing to take a teen girl for a week or so as she was needing to be moved from her current foster home.  I agreed that we could take her.  We were not expecting our experiences to start so quickly, but I don't believe in co-incidence, only God-incidence.

next step taken

After emailing with Jackie a bit, I asked what we should be doing now....if we should go ahead and submit our interest form on the adoption site for the group of 4 we are interested in.  she said YES! That would be wonderful!  So I did.  Now we are waiting to hear back from the worker on the other end.  Don't know how long to expect to wait but there are always projects to keep us busy in the mean time!

It arrived!

We did in fact get our verification letter today and our home is now certified to hold foster/pre-adoptive kids!  On to the next step!

In the mail

just heard from our worker Jackie, she said good news is in the mail to us!  I'm sure that means our certificate is on it's way and we should have it by saturday.  She has started the process from her end on getting us more information on this group
http://tare.dfps.state.tx.us/search/SibDetail.jsp?SibGroupNumber=30308
Time will tell if these are the ones we will bring home or not. 
My heart is overflowing with joy as we are at this point in the process!  Our family will be expanding soon!

Rejoicing!

Just got an email from Jackie and we will have our approval next week!  The long awaited information that we need was put in the mail today!

An email

I got an email from Jackie today asking us to consider a pair of sisters.  They are into basketball and we don't do organized sports so I replied that I didn't feel they would be happy here.  Jackie also said they have still not heard back from hawaii.  I said they probably wouldn't without some SERIOUS badgering.  She responded to that asking me to write out a little about us and what we are looking for in a group of kids so that she could send out something written by me to her connections.  I really wonder if this means they are going to work around not having that paper.  Guess time will tell.